I have stayed in Hyde Park, Chicago, but I have not lived here in a sense much less enjoyed this neighborhood; I was not aware of this community of neighbors. Most of the time I just passed by the streets or maybe I thought I didn't have to know this community. I stayed here in Hyde Park as a guest. But today I realized that I live here. This afternoon my wife and I went out for lunch. By the way, the weather was just perfect. We went to a small neighborhood restaurant. The food was wonderful together with nice people there. After eating, we walked around the Harper Court to see what was interesting around us. We found many interesting stores such as health foods, records stores, face and body care shops, etc. For the first time since we lived here, we realized that living is different from staying.
Stillness in the midst of busy-ness, 3/1/2000
No matter how busy, there is always a place for stillness, a time for calm down, a time for a little reflection, a time for thinking back to my past life, and a time for thinking ahead of my life. 'Busyness' doesn't have to do with my absolute time. Rather, it has to do with my mental capacity. Even Jesus often times found a still place, a kind of solitary place for praying, for thinking ahead of his life, even though he was so busy taking care of the needy. I need ten minutes in my own place to be myself. It can be a corner of the library or any place that I find easily according to the day's situation. The richness of life is from the little time of contemplation. I enjoy being alone, at least for ten minutes a day. I stand before God as a solitary unique person.
A little flower that knows the time, 2/29/2000
After a long hibernation, a tiny flower in front of my apartment was in bud. It cannot be seen easily before our eyes because we don't have still minds and open eyes. But this afternoon I saw it awakening from such a long sleep. I was just amazed by this flower that knows the time to come out and to tell the season to us. A time to know the season, a time to rethink our past winter, a time to awaken my hibernation, a time to restart, and a time to work.
Going around is not really going around, 3/7/2000
My daily life is full of a busy schedule. So often times I am hurried to make my schedule go well. I choose the best way to keep my schedule fine. I am probably too much tuned to economic living that needs efficient time management. As always, I try to find a shortcut to get to the meeting place. But life is not used to such a well-planned economic system. Rather, life needs a free, flexible, indirect way. That is to say, GOING ROUND gives us time to enjoy the time and the process of getting there. How did I get this idea? This morning I walked around the nearby park Nichols in the morning. With the fresh air, I tasted the smell of the maturity of the spring. In fact, this park is close to our apartment several blocks away. But I don't use this park all year round. I could have used this park to go to the school or the bank I was going to. Life is not always giving us the best shortcuts. Intentionally I choose a round-way. Going around is also going.
A new definition of living together, 3/8/2000
When we say we live together, it usually means living together with other people (human beings). But living together is not complete unless we extend its meaning and boundary to the whole creation. Namely, we have to include birds, dogs, any living animals, any kind of living things in the world such as trees, plants, grass, and more than that, even including the earth, air, the wind, whatever exists in the world. Unfortunately, because of our anthropocentric orientation, we have been thinking in a way that we maximize our own benefits at the price of our fellow beings whether living or not. When we say that we are part of nature, our eyes and ears are opened so that we can hear the sound, the color, and the smell of nature. We, then, can hear the birds singing and flying over the sky freely. We would spot even a little movement of the ants on the ground, otherwise, it will never be recognized. Humans are not the center of this world but just a part of it. What is the benefit for us to say this? Yes, there is a big benefit. Try this! Go out for a walk in the early morning and find the best park or any street you want to walk on for a while. Slowly walk around it and pay attention to your breath, on whatever you see with the fresh air. Then your heart will be full of the energy of nature.
Living with disability in God and community, 6/22/2000
Stillness in the midst of busy-ness, 3/1/2000
No matter how busy, there is always a place for stillness, a time for calm down, a time for a little reflection, a time for thinking back to my past life, and a time for thinking ahead of my life. 'Busyness' doesn't have to do with my absolute time. Rather, it has to do with my mental capacity. Even Jesus often times found a still place, a kind of solitary place for praying, for thinking ahead of his life, even though he was so busy taking care of the needy. I need ten minutes in my own place to be myself. It can be a corner of the library or any place that I find easily according to the day's situation. The richness of life is from the little time of contemplation. I enjoy being alone, at least for ten minutes a day. I stand before God as a solitary unique person.
A little flower that knows the time, 2/29/2000
After a long hibernation, a tiny flower in front of my apartment was in bud. It cannot be seen easily before our eyes because we don't have still minds and open eyes. But this afternoon I saw it awakening from such a long sleep. I was just amazed by this flower that knows the time to come out and to tell the season to us. A time to know the season, a time to rethink our past winter, a time to awaken my hibernation, a time to restart, and a time to work.
Going around is not really going around, 3/7/2000
My daily life is full of a busy schedule. So often times I am hurried to make my schedule go well. I choose the best way to keep my schedule fine. I am probably too much tuned to economic living that needs efficient time management. As always, I try to find a shortcut to get to the meeting place. But life is not used to such a well-planned economic system. Rather, life needs a free, flexible, indirect way. That is to say, GOING ROUND gives us time to enjoy the time and the process of getting there. How did I get this idea? This morning I walked around the nearby park Nichols in the morning. With the fresh air, I tasted the smell of the maturity of the spring. In fact, this park is close to our apartment several blocks away. But I don't use this park all year round. I could have used this park to go to the school or the bank I was going to. Life is not always giving us the best shortcuts. Intentionally I choose a round-way. Going around is also going.
A new definition of living together, 3/8/2000
When we say we live together, it usually means living together with other people (human beings). But living together is not complete unless we extend its meaning and boundary to the whole creation. Namely, we have to include birds, dogs, any living animals, any kind of living things in the world such as trees, plants, grass, and more than that, even including the earth, air, the wind, whatever exists in the world. Unfortunately, because of our anthropocentric orientation, we have been thinking in a way that we maximize our own benefits at the price of our fellow beings whether living or not. When we say that we are part of nature, our eyes and ears are opened so that we can hear the sound, the color, and the smell of nature. We, then, can hear the birds singing and flying over the sky freely. We would spot even a little movement of the ants on the ground, otherwise, it will never be recognized. Humans are not the center of this world but just a part of it. What is the benefit for us to say this? Yes, there is a big benefit. Try this! Go out for a walk in the early morning and find the best park or any street you want to walk on for a while. Slowly walk around it and pay attention to your breath, on whatever you see with the fresh air. Then your heart will be full of the energy of nature.
Living with disability in God and community, 6/22/2000
Many people live with a disability but our culture and society function for the majority of "normal" persons. I walk well but sometimes I do not consider much about those who do not walk well. I think everyone tends to forget about others' difficulties. In one way or another, we all have kinds of disabilities or weaknesses. Nevertheless, somehow we tend to promote the society of "normal" people. But we have to remember we have more or less intrinsic disability whether it is physical or not. The weakness or disability of our bodies makes us rethink ourselves, especially about our living together. In other words, the life of a community needs to find a new meaning of living together. The meaningfulness of a community does not lie in the degree of success, which is measured by soundness healthiness, or normality. The real meaning of a community, I think, should be found in its community itself in terms of how that community as a whole supports the weak, the unfortunate, and the disabled in many ways. In this way of thinking disability is not an unfortunate thing of an individual but a task that a community should embrace to support disabled persons. The word "support" is not limited to social welfare. It is more than that. In fact, this support involves whole aspects of life, from bodily to spiritual, from social, communal to personal. It is also a mystery that we grow together by taking care of each other. Sharing our sound body with others and supporting those in need are blessings of God who intends to enrich our human community in a way we learn to help each other.
Dancing at a time of low
When I led a bible study group, one person asked or rather challenged me, saying: "How is it possible to dance when I am low?" In fact, this question was not sudden but was expected because my day's topic or theme was related to dancing with God. My thesis was that we could dance bodily or spiritually in any circumstances. What is dancing? If we can think of dancing as an expression of merriness with a bodily movement, that person cannot dance at all when s/he is low. But what if we would think of dancing as something like an expression of our whole being, high or low? Certainly, there is a sorrowful or liberating dancing in Korea such as Hanpoori, which is usually performed by women. Women used to express their Han - bitter and hurt feelings or oppressed ones - by this Hanpoori. In this sense of dancing Han, dancing is hardly related to simple joy or happiness. Rather, hanpoori is one way of letting go of emotional or oppressive leftovers of hearts. Through that process of Hanpoori, women reach liberating moments and get the energy to sustain them with self-empowerment. So, we can dance all the time, high or low. Dancing is, in essence, God's in the sense that God is dancing with an intra-divine relationship: God the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Like a divine community of dancing, our dancing is also danced in a community, high or low.
Dancing at a time of low
When I led a bible study group, one person asked or rather challenged me, saying: "How is it possible to dance when I am low?" In fact, this question was not sudden but was expected because my day's topic or theme was related to dancing with God. My thesis was that we could dance bodily or spiritually in any circumstances. What is dancing? If we can think of dancing as an expression of merriness with a bodily movement, that person cannot dance at all when s/he is low. But what if we would think of dancing as something like an expression of our whole being, high or low? Certainly, there is a sorrowful or liberating dancing in Korea such as Hanpoori, which is usually performed by women. Women used to express their Han - bitter and hurt feelings or oppressed ones - by this Hanpoori. In this sense of dancing Han, dancing is hardly related to simple joy or happiness. Rather, hanpoori is one way of letting go of emotional or oppressive leftovers of hearts. Through that process of Hanpoori, women reach liberating moments and get the energy to sustain them with self-empowerment. So, we can dance all the time, high or low. Dancing is, in essence, God's in the sense that God is dancing with an intra-divine relationship: God the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Like a divine community of dancing, our dancing is also danced in a community, high or low.
Learning from Nature
I was sitting on a bench at Nichols Park in South Chicago. On a sunny, breezy, flowery, green, spring afternoon, the heart-melting spring wind touches on my winter soul, barren tiredness after a long snowy, chilly, desolate winter. I felt ineffably smug like a baby in a mother’s bosom. Green grass, different plants, and trees blanket the whole park. My eyes conspicuously spotted yellow dandelion. Some trees wear white flowers; still others do not put on any green clothing and remain the same as in winter. I see some trees tall and others small. Above me, the sparse gray-white clouds hung in the sky and the pleasant sun throws its warming light upon nature. Birds are singing sweet songs of the spring. When I look at green leaves, I feel energized. Looking at winter trees that do not hold any leaves, I prepare for the spring through winter. It is a great reminder of how humans go through that kind of cycle, which is nothing negative but a necessary part of life rooted in divine, providential wisdom.Oh! Nature is truly a learning school--the best school in the world. I can learn many things from great nature, which has multiple, divergent, different colors, shapes, and heights. No green or white is superior to black brown or yellow. In nature many different things naturally inhabit. Each thing in nature does not seem strange to one another. Each thing is just there as part of the whole and also as a distinctive agent in nature. When each thing takes one’s own color, shape, and size, which means distinctiveness, then each thing in nature is beautiful on its own and is in harmony with other things. Heidegger’s philosophic idea of dasein (being there) is a great reminder that each being in nature is meaningful by being there. In other words, no one can control others' existence or impose a meaning on the other. It is a joy to find a similar idea from the Chinese word for nature: cha-yun. Cha literally means "for oneself" or "self" and yun means "for granted" or "given."
In nature, there is no hierarchy but an interdependent relation through which other things exist. On the other side of "being there," interdependence or interconnected life in nature must be emphasized, as modern ecology or biology or any other science greatly reflects this interconnected life in the world and universe, which marks a great shift away from the Newtonian idea of materialistic, atomic, mechanic worldview in which things are not connected with each other, often leading to lifeless study and to exploitation of nature. The sheer realization is that nothing in the world or universe can exist in isolation.
My early childhood memories begin and end with nature. There were no toys or television sets available in our small village; so we had to go out to play with other kids in the rice fields or on the little plateau of the small mountains in front of our village. I have so many beautiful memories of these early days. I would like to describe how we played in nature according to the seasonal change. In spring we have very mild weather, which naturally calls our minds to the rice fields, the hilly small mountains and orchards, and vineyards. Usually, we play soccer on the low plateau or sometimes on the rice fields. Often times we play other kinds of games that have to do with the ground. Another time in spring we go out to the mountain or orchards to find a bird’s nest or sometimes to put a trap in between the fence trees to catch a wild rabbit. At another time we shoot birds with a handmade wooden rubber shooter (slingshot). This very primitive tool cannot kill birds but at most hurt them. Still, at times we just play on the grass by wrestling with one another. As is often the case, one of our tasks as rural boys is to feed rabbits or oxen at home, which means we have to collect various plant foods from nature. Those good plants for rabbits and oxen can be obtained on the edges of unpaved rural pathways, riverbanks, small fords, rice fields, orchards, and so forth. But sometimes we take our oxen to the good places to feed them.
In summer we go to a river to swim or to fish. We have a shallow river a mile off from our village. We all kids love water. Nobody taught us how to swim, but we learned. We go fishing at times to the rivers and ponds. On some rainy nights, we stay awake to catch lots of fish. In autumn we help our parents in harvesting rice, apple, grape, pear, watermelon, and other produce. In the middle of a dark night, sometimes we crawl under the fence of the small watermelon field to pick and eat watermelon. When winter comes, we go to the small mountains to hunt rabbits by chasing them through their footsteps clearly marked on the snow. We also do sledding at a small hilly mountain, using a small plate put on our hips. At other times, we go to the frozen rivers or the ponds to enjoy skating or to break the ice (risky play) in the middle of the ponds.
TRUTH
As for me, the truth is deeply experiential, confessional, and contextual. It should be engaged in a community that he or she lives, embodied in a world beyond his or her immediate community, and testified at all costs because of the love of God for all people. Bellah also comments on the mistaken view of truth: “The mistake arises when we take language which is deeply contextual, that is confessional, and in the case of Paul probably also liturgical, and turn it into objective assertions of a quasi-scientific form that give us information about the eternal fate of non-Christians.” Robert Bellah, “At home and not at home: Religious pluralism and religious truth” Christian Century, April 1995.
I have a passion for human transformation, rooted in self-knowledge and self-criticism. Traveling to many Latin American countries during my business career, I learned a great deal about cultural diversity and the need for human solidarity. With a new vocation of theological education, I now ask: What does it mean to live in this world in relation to each other (i.e., meaning of the Other -- which resonates with Emmanuel Levinas' "The face of the other," Paul Ricoeur's inter-subjective narrative identity, or Jacques Derrida's "relationless relation"), and How can we do theology in our thoughts, deeds and action, while moving pointedly away from individualism? How can we read biblical stories with each other in a critical context? What are some viable definitions of cross-cultural hermeneutics, if any, by which we can improve the sense of living together in differences?
My approach to the Bible and human transformation is based on kenosis. Let me illustrate it. Once upon a time, there was a father and his son; they were beggars. One day just across a river a big fire broke out and saw a big house being burnt down by the fire. The father said to his son proudly, "My son, we are so fortunate because we do not have a house to be burnt down." This comic but pithy conversation speaks of some lessons about our lives. There is a saying in the Buddhist book Banyasimkyung: "sak-jeuk-see-gong and gong-jeuk-see-sak," which can be translated as "all visible things are empty, and all that are empty are visible." It is hard to explain here what it means. I can say this: Life is nothing (empty) but your nothingness (emptiness) makes you something.
Similarly, Christian understanding of kenosis (Phil 2:6-11, emptying of oneself) reflects a nothingness attitude in our lives. It is also found in the Q gospel: There was once a rich man whose lands yielded a good harvest. He thought to himself, "What should I do? I don't have enough room to store my crops. I know, I'll tear down my barns and build bigger ones so that I can keep all my grain in them. Then I will say to myself, 'I have enough to last me for years. I can take it easy, eat, drink, and have a good time.' But God said to him, "You fool! This very night you may die. Then who will own this hoard of yours? So it is with those who pile up possessions but remain poor in the treasures of the spirit. Jesus says, "If you try to gain your life, you will lose it; but if you lose it, you will gain it." St. Paul also says, "I die every day on the cross." If you gather more and more and do not give out, you will become slaves of riches. But if you give up more and more, your freedom of heart will be greater and greater. Furthermore, you will live a meaningful life, a perfect life with a sense of living with others in the community. In this way our life extends forever; it is not different from the idea of “eternal life” in the Gospel of John. True spirituality begins when we feel the same fate as others and act out by giving what we have. God wants a fair balance between the rich and the poor. God wants the light and life for all because God is the God of all. That is how I read the Bible.
1 Kings 19:1-10
Ahab told Jezebel all that Elijah had done, and how he had killed all the prophets with the sword. Then Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah, saying, ‘So may the gods do to me, and more also, if I do not make your life like the life of one of them by this time tomorrow.’ Then he was afraid; he got up and fled for his life, and came to Beer-sheba, which belongs to Judah; he left his servant there. But he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness, and came and sat down under a solitary broom tree. He asked that he might die: ‘It is enough (I have had enough); now, O Lord, take my life, for I am no better than my ancestors.’ Then he lay down under the broom tree and fell asleep. Suddenly an angel touched him and said to him, ‘Get up and eat.’ He looked, and there at his head was a cake baked on hot stones, and a jar of water. He ate and drank, and lay down again. The angel of the Lord came a second time, touched him, and said, ‘Get up and eat, otherwise the journey will be too much for you.’ He got up, and ate and drank; then he went in the strength of that food for forty days and forty nights to Horeb the mount of God. At that place he came to a cave, and spent the night there. Then the word of the Lord came to him, saying, ‘What are you doing here, Elijah?’ He answered, ‘I have been very zealous for the Lord, the God of hosts; for the Israelites have forsaken your covenant, thrown down your altars, and killed your prophets with the sword. I alone am left, and they are seeking my life, to take it away.’All too often we feel like giving up when there is no hope or meaning in this world. We live in a world where so many people are badly affected by disasters, natural or human. We live in a world where our circumstances block our growth and survival.
There are even people who are fast doing evil. For many reasons and in complex situations, we often say just like Elijah: "I have had enough, Lord; take my life. I am no better than my ancestors." This is the moment when we like to give up on ourselves, only finding much reason for giving up. Jezebel seeks the life of Elijah because of his bold prophecy and mighty action that caused the destruction of the Baal prophets.
Now she tries to revenge him because her power and prestige were ridiculed and damaged. So Elijah ran for his life. Where is his faith and courage that he made great works for God? Is this the picture of a great spiritual leader?
But his fear is real. Indeed, he is a mere man, not an angel or god. His joy, energy, and passion for God on the Mount of Carmel melted out just like the snow under the sun. He is drained out and completely burned out. Nothing is left of him other than the desire to give up due to the threat of Jezebel.
This is the time that he needs to sustain his life not by looking to himself or to other people or the environment. He needs to refresh his body and soul by looking to God. When a person is situated in this dire moment when nothing he or she can do other than the desire to give up, this is the moment of lament, crying for God's justice and power.
We still can pray when nothing can be achieved. Because a prayer can change or transform a person's mind and heart to get focused on God, beyond one's own ability and judgment. That is a moment of relief! That is a moment of refreshing one's soul, coming from not an easy environment but from the unfamiliar, mysterious source of God.
Actually, this is a very dangerous time too, because one can take his or her own life when there is no easy way out. This is where there must be a miracle, not a supernatural one but godly help. This is when the preacher's teacher or friend might come to his or her aid.
In Elijah's story, the angel appears and provides the need for Elijah. In a very dire moment like this, there must be an aid from outside of him. He cannot deal with everything by himself. He should realize this. Although he did a marvelous job on the Mount of Carmel, what he did was not his but God's.
Often leaders forget about this. When things get rough, they easily forget about their identity or place that has to do with God's mission. Elijah should have reflected on where he was or what he was doing in the wilderness.
He seeks his life only, abandoning God's work and people. God wants him to go back on his journey. God's message is: "Hang in there; I will provide for you. You can give up on yourself. But don't give up on me." Elijah needs God's power once again. That is only through his realization that he cannot sustain himself. That is faith and courage. When faith fades and fear engulfs, we have to know this: "Nothing can separate us from the love of God" (Rom 8:28).
Job (in the Book of Job) is a righteous person, and God acknowledges his faith. Job lives a good life with blessings of children, wealth, and so forth until one day he loses everything including his children. His body is soaked with skin disease. Satan bets against God, saying that if the blessings of Job are taken away from him, he will betray God. But God does not agree with Satan and goes on to bet with him.
So the test begins. Virtually, Job loses everything, all his children suddenly being killed one after another. Even his wife asks him to die after cursing the God he trusts. He is in total despair. His friends ask him to repent his sins so that God will restore him. But Job does not agree with the conventional wisdom or theology that bad fortune is the result of sin.
Even though he is not perfect, Job does not deserve such horrendous suffering and the loss of everything. He confronts such a cruel or unjust God. He laments even his birth being born with the flesh. The most difficult part of his suffering is he does not receive the right response from God. A long time of dialogues with his friends and the time of suffering persist. Yet there are no satisfactory answers.
Finally, God makes an answer to Job out of the storm wind. Job wants to hear an answer regarding his questions, for example: Why do good people suffer? Is God just? Instead, God basically says, "Shut up" (this is my summary). God reminds Job of his mortality and limitations in that he cannot comprehend God. God's counter-question is just too cruel to Job in a way: "Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth?" (Job 38:4).
The idea here is that "Job, you are unable to know why you suffer. You are mortal. Stay where you are. I will be with you when you go through a long deep dark tunnel." Perhaps Job realizes his futile attempt to know all about his suffering or pain. Suffering is the dark side of creation. If this is a reality, the more important task is how to live with it. That is what the Book of Job is about.
A paradoxical truth is that Job maintains his faith in God even though he does not hear a good answer from God. His faith acknowledges human mortality and God's sovereignty.